E-readers and Books

Posted: May 25, 2012 in Books
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I passionately miss books. When I say that many people may think I’m referring to actual reading, but I’ve always been an avid reader. I can read just about anything, but fantasy and fiction in general has always been my favorites. I love being brought into a writer’s world. I love getting to know new characters and being taken on an adventure that’s a few hundred pages long. I even love the satisfaction and sense of accomplishment that I get from finishing a book.

Maybe it’s because of my lifelong obsession with reading that’s made me a little wary of getting an e-book. I could probably build a human-sized tower with the amount of books I’ve read in the last 20 years. Yet, with things like Nooks and Kindles out, small electronic devices that could easily slide into most women’s purses can hold more books than people’s bookshelves.

I understand. I really do get it. There’s so many pros to having e-readers. For one, they’re sleek and convenient. They also save a lot of money on paper (I’m big on not being a complete parasite to the environment), they allow you to buy and immediately start reading books from the comfort of your home, you can read them comfortably in the dark, they aren’t as easily destroyable as books… The list goes on.

Even still there’s just something I love about paper. Maybe because I spent so much time around it growing. I’ve done so much reading and writing the it might make even some of the most avid readers cringe. Nothing could ever replace a book for me, but what can you do in the 21st century? Books will never be replaceable. Electronics can always glitch and be a little crazy, but when something is actually printed onto paper it’s difficult to truly be rid of that, especially when paper has it’s own convenience (not having to boot up, it never “glitches,” it’s easier to “flip through, etc. etc.), but e-readers won’t be going anywhere any time soon. They are immensely popular and much to convenient.

Eventually I’ll have one too, but I’ll probably wait it out as long as I possibly can. Until then I’ll be completely content with taking an extra trip to the bookstore, walking the aisles and picking up the more attractive and physical copy of books.

It’s Good To Be Home

Posted: May 18, 2012 in Uncategorized

So, I’ve been in Texas for the last couple of weeks, and I finally got back home today. It’s always amazing how you can’t wait to leave, to go on vacation, to take trips, then after a while you get homesick. You go home and you’re saddened by being home and life going back to the way it was. I always get a thrill out of going to new places… then coming back depressed…

Well, now that I’m finally home again, I can definitely get back to blogging as well as doing some of the things that I’ve missed. The number one thing on my list for tomorrow is picking up my cello; I feel like it’s been collecting dust since I’ve been gone, and I just know I’m rusty!

Dream Serpents

Posted: April 24, 2012 in Poetry
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swallow back the poisons
for killing off the soul
as each layer of self
pools in rancid decay
where she has fallen
broken down to accept
this bitter drink
pure self loathing
poured down her throat
seeps from trembling lips
staining every desire
dripping onto
hands and breasts
she would open wounds
to bleed emotion
pain is the sex
of her wounded soul
its self-infliction
a futile masturbation
of dead and dying dreams
long beyond feeling
pleading to be saved
her only whisper
let me go

I’ve always been relatively small when it comes to weight and size. I’m 5’3 in height and oscillated between 100 and 115 pounds throughout high school and college. Despite not always eating right, I’ve been able to maintain a relatively slim figure and a healthy body for the majority of my life. I’m definitely not one of the “lucky” ones with a fast metabolism; I have curves and thighs and a butt. I mainly owe this long term fitness to a couple of years in ballet and over 10 years in gymnastics while I was growing up… Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE to eat. In fact, I LOVE food in general. I love how it looks and tastes. I’m also obsessed with the texture. There are just certain foods that I hate specifically because of how it feels in my mouth; the taste itself may be wonderful, but the texture may turn me off completely from ever wanting to have it again. I enjoy going to restaurants. I enjoy foreign foods (namely Mexican and Thai), and I enjoy trying new ones. I know that I’m not the only one who likes food so much. However, there’s a difference between enjoying food, yet making efforts to eat foods that are good for your body while taking time to exercise and just stuffing your face without a care in the world.

Many people are not in shape. Being “in shape” requires both physical activity as well as good eating habits. It’s a lifestyle change that most people aren’t willing to undergo, but instead of accepting that and willing to make a change, all you get is a bunch people whining and getting sensitive about people calling them fat. I’ll say it plainly: When I see a morbidly obese person I get grossed out. Literally, grossed out. My first thought is “Do you look in the mirror before you leave the house?” My next thought is “How did you let yourself get like that?” Then I just feel bad because it has to be difficult and miserable to live that way.

Sure, I have several friends who are fat. Just because you don’t take care of yourself when it comes to your weight/health, that doesn’t make you a bad person or somehow lower than other people. I wouldn’t define myself as shallow at all. However, I am rational and realistic. There’s no need to sugarcoat it. YOU ARE FAT. Accept it, and if you don’t like that label do something to change it. Take steps and make healthy choices towards becoming physically fit. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. I think the main reason for obesity is simply laziness and an unwillingness to change habitual routine and action, especially if it’s something that you don’t like doing. I think a very large secondary reason why there is so much obesity is because people ignore many objective truths in exchange for trying to make other people feel better about themselves. Fat women nowadays are called “curvy” and call themselves “real women.” There’s people who say things like, “Don’t call girls fat. That’s how you make people get eating disorders…” No, actually that’s not at all how people get EDs. As physically obvious as they can be, they are also (and perhaps most importantly) psychological disorders.

Being mean and cruel about someone being overweight or bringing it up unprovoked is psychologically dangerous. But, if that’s not the case, I think it’s time for us to be honest with each other. If you’re gay you’re gay, if you’re Asian you’re Asian, if you’re tall you’re tall, and if you’re fat you’re fat. If your doctor tells you that you’re 100 pounds overweight and you’re at risk for a variety of diseases, is it really appropriate to huff and throw a tantrum and say that he’s mean? There are certain parameters that are universal and scientifically designed to measure healthy weight.

Telling a friend they need to lose weight is a lot more honest and loving rather than telling them that they look amazing, then they get diabetes or have a heart attack 2 years down the line from being too fat. Wouldn’t you tell someone you loved that they had a booger hanging out their nose or if they smell? I think it’s really important for us to stop lying for the sake of each others’ feelings. If you’re not the blunt type, you can easily make an appropriate joke out of it or make plans to work out together and stick with it. Falsifying and sugarcoating is what’s really cruel.

Unspoken (poem)

Posted: April 19, 2012 in Poetry

These words held captive
behind softly pursed lips
such terrified creatures
stretching delicate wings
beating in desperate rhythms
seeking only to escape
the desolate void within
A darkness so cold
ever present dangers
burning so painfully
searing their fragility
in another dire surge
of wings crushing throes
caressing the flesh of soul
So many are now lost
to such terror and fears
with pristine bodies
tumbling into the abyss
and now ever lost
to souls aching hunger
ever to remain unspoken.

The Self (poem)

Posted: April 19, 2012 in Poetry
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Of warm corpse
and death descending
‘neath unflinching gaze
do her demons await

Breeders of discord
rending soft flesh
black glistens red
dripping brutal truths

Delicate hands reaching
offered poor feast
bitter sweet poisons
they did create

Whetted of sins
trembling lips plead
for yet another sip
for one last dream

Writer’s Block No More!

Posted: April 18, 2012 in Random

So, I was busy reading tonight, and realized about 2 hours ago that it was after 12:00 a.m., which, if you paid any attention to my last post, I made a goal to blog every single day for at least 2 weeks. I never view the early morning hours as the “next day,” so, putting all technicalities aside, I’d like to pretend that I didn’t completely fail this test I made for myself in less than 48 hours. ;)

That being said, I am ecstatic about being able to write again. For the longest time I haven’t been able to, but now it’s come back to me, and I am on FIRE! I have several new poems and short stories that I’m excited to share. Can’t wait to post them!